The Tiring Guitarist

Today, I would like to share some words about an specie that is in danger of non-extinction. They call themselves “guitarists” because they play the guitar. A more accurate description of them would say that they abuse and rape the guitar. “Play” is a too kind word for what they do.

They show themselves in most cities of the south of Europe, though some people assure they have seen them in other parts of the world. They are usually blonde males with curly hair, but you can also see them in brunette and with hair gel (specially in Spain and Italy). The Tiring Guitarist is recognised by a hunchback they call guitar. But when they wear it in his back is fine. This animal is extremely dangerous when he plays his hunchback… or guitar. These beings can play the guitar and sing at the same time for hours without hurting himself.

Many scholars say that they work for the pharmaceutical industry, as they cause headache whenever they play and sing. Some of these tiring guitarists wear Bayer ads in their shirts, according to witnesses.

If you see one of them, you must know that they look domestic but they are not and if you try to interact with them, they will hit you with an everlasting song. They are not evil, it is just in their nature. In cities like Seville, famous by its flamenco and its guitarist sounds, the mayor have already ordered the hunt and chase of some of these beasts in order to stop their overpopulation.

In this year, The Tiring Guitarist have killed more people than the Philippine mosquito. The competent authorities recommend to stay away from these animals and avoid any kind of contact or interaction with them, specially physical and aural.


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