April Horoscope

Our monthly revision of what the future will bring you. Accurate and clear.

Aquarius

This month, you might decide to put your ass in a new setting: go to the same club or look for a different one in order to feel refreshed. Although you might not decide anything. Whatever it happens, remember this: I told you.

Pisces

You won’t be content sitting at home during the nights of April, or at least, during some of them. Don’t hesitate and socialise your body a bit. Only a bit, man! I’m not asking you to hang out the entire day, but if you could just go out to feed the pigeons, that would be a massive step. Besides, pigeons would be more than grateful, and you’ll be saving your head to be shat by them. You know how Karma works…

Aries

This month, Saturn is going to be set in the seventh house. In other words, you’ll be posting a photo of you smiling with sunglasses on Instagram under the hashtag #Happy Monday. If you aren’t an Instagram account owner, you’ll considerate the possibility of creating a new one in order to upload the previously described photo.

Taurus

Taurus, something special awaits you. You are going to be witness of something magnificent. Yes, I shouldn’t be so specific, but you know, I like to provide as many details as I can gather.

Gemini

This time, Gemini, you won’t care what others think. You are going to be yourself and you are going to love it. I know that I say this every month, Gemini, but this time I really mean it.

Cancer

Do you remember the last time that you had fun? Don’t you remember? So you were drunk that day… Ok, then forget it.

Leo

You’ll loose your Oscar several times. But don’t you worry, you’ll find it, although it won’t be golden any more.

Virgo

You’ll try to perform changes in your life and you’ll stand still, and your legs will suffer that. Don’t blame me, blame the solar eclipse in Pisces. This solar eclipse in Pisces is going to be a mess, I can tell you.

Libra

Libra, this is going to be your month. I don’t know why, but I have the feeling in me. When you hit the flow the girls will come snapping at you. It doesn’t matter your gender, your likes or anything. It will just happen.

Scorpio

You’ll find a balance in your life. I mean the instrument for weighing objects. Your life will still be a mess as usual.

Sagittarius

There’s a likelihood you’ll meet someone very exciting. However, as I told Virgo, there’s a solar eclipse in Pisces, so there’s also a likelihood you won’t meet that someone. Therefore, the point is that there’s no point. I hope I have taken a load of your mind. You can breath back now. You are very welcome.

Capricorn

The planets tell me that you have been thinking that it is time to add spice to your life. I’m not going to tell you the opposite. In fact, the angels recommend me that you should. It is said that it is used in the Indian cookery, and if you like Indian food, go ahead. By the way, you’ll be considering new relationships, whether you know it or not. Subconscious, you surprise me every day.

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4 thoughts on “April Horoscope

  1. Pingback: May Horoscope | The Galician Lad

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