Honking Them Softly

She was honked by taxi drivers during all her life. She felt like she was nothing, when those creatures blew the horn to her. But that was about to change. Cristina was tired of all that. She had made a decision. She will be the one to honk now. She will be safe her life by ruining the taxi drivers ones.

But how is Cristina going to do such a thing? Easy answer for her. Cristina began to follow taxi drivers from her town until they committed any kind of driving illegality. And they did commit illegalities, and when that happened, she honked them as much as she could. That fed Cristina deeply. She no longer ate. The only thing she did for eating was blowing the horn to taxi drivers. She needed no more.

Full life was the one Cristina was living. Some people mention that revenge does not give satisfaction. Cristina strongly disagrees with that statement. Cristina was having fun as she never did. She actually started to wear a cape like the one that superman used to wear in films. What a crazy woman Cristina is! She self-proclaimed superhero, because she fought taxi drivers. Sometimes she did not sleep, because she said she had to fight the taxi drivers crime. And when that happened, she wore the Batman’s cape, instead of the Superman’s. There was nothing she did not thing about. She was clever, although a bit crazy… But clever!

We have recently received a reply letter from one of the taxi drivers who are suffering this situation:

I can’t continue like this. When this woman started to pursuit drivers, many of my colleagues moved to another city. I was heard that that city was empty because of this woman. There was no taxis there. And what did the crazy woman? Yes, she moved to the next village. And she does so constantly. The taxi driver community is overwhelmed. We do not know what to do with her. We promised that we won’t horn her again, but she doesn’t care. She is addicted to the horn. She loves to press the horn. Some friends told me that she even lick the horn. Can you imagine? Don’t you see what we are suffering?

Cristina heard about this letter and she decided to answer by herself while she was refuelling:

You call me crazy? -according to some witnesses, she wrote this while shaking the head side to side, in an African American style-. You bosses of the road… Who drives better than you? Of course no one, you do it all perfect and the others do it all wrong… Well, now it is my time. And you’re not gonna stop me. I’m gonna horn you all the way down. You’re gonna be kissing my horn and you know it to be true. Macklemore is gonna make a song with this words in no time.
Finally, I don’t want to bid farewell without saying that I’m looking forward to kick your asses with my horn, you pieces of ☠ (personal attacks, downgrading and invectives, as well as a lack of polite words follow these words that we have decided not to include in this tale, in order to avoid hurting people’s feelings).

We will keep you informed of further events.


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